Londoner

Lionel Messi

The world's best footballer reportedly fancied a move to Arsenal this summer, but the north London club couldn't face paying the £200 million transfer fee.

Damon Albarn

The Blur and Gorillaz popster is writing a West End musical. 'It's something I've always wanted to do, because musicals are great when they're done well,' he reasoned.

Terry Jones

The Monty Python star has given his backing to the Sunday living wage strikes at the Ritzy cinema, urging cinema-goers to boycott his own film. 'Ask for your money back for Ritzy Cinema Brixton,' he Tweeted.

Doctor Who

Deep Breath - the first episode of the new series starring Peter Capaldi - is to be shown at the BFI Southbank, 6.30pm, Thursday 7 August, part of the Sci-Fi: Days of Fear and Wonder season. Capaldi himself is part of the Q&A panel; tickets are £16.

Google Maps

They've launched a 3-D map version of London. 'This means every building, not just the famous landmarks, the terrain, and any surrounding landscape of trees are included,' said a spokesperson. All good, but a bit of a blow that London wasn't done until after places like Reading and Stoke.

Lindsay Lohan

Celebrated moving to London by falling over in Italy. La Lohan - hopefully on her feet - is due to star in Speed-the-Plow at the Playhouse theatre from September. Tickets here.

Ian Cable

The London cabbie has become the first to switch to a cashless payment system, using the Barclay's Pingit app. 'I am always up for trying new technology,' said Cable, who should probably change his surname to Wifi or Bluetooth.

Cheryl Cole

She's confirmed that she married Jean-Bernard Fernandez-Versini last Monday. 'I want to share my happy news,' said the X Factor judge. 'Jean-Bernard and I married on 7/7/14.' The wedding took place on a beach on Mustique with just four guests.

Bastille Festival

Boules, a French-flavoured Borough Market and a working guillotine dripping with real flesh* are all features of the Bastille festival, which on Sunday marks the French Revolution. * Melon flesh.

Water Cannon

London Mayor Boris Johnson's new toys have arrived, ready to wash away pesky demonstrators. 'Water cannon have no place on our streets,' said London Assembly member Jenny Jones. Especially when it rains.

Johnny Tourist

More international travellers - 18.7 million of them - are set to visit London than other city in the world this year, spending an average of £1,387. It's the third time London has hit top spot in four years.

Pete Doherty

After the rowdy show at Hyde Park on the weekend, Pete and The Libertines have added another date to their autumn stint at Alexandra Palace. They'll now play on the 26, 27 and 28 September. Tickets on sale here.

Vincenzo Nibali

Wears the leader's yellow jersey as the English leg of the Tour de France makes its way south. Le Tour is expected in Woodford at 2.55pm, at the Olympic Park by 3.11 and ends for the day on The Mall at 3.42.

Regent Street

Traffic free this Sunday for the first of four similar pedestrian-is-king days, each with a different theme. This time it's a Garden Party, complete with grass, haystacks, bees and butterflies, plus free live jazz.

Duchess of Cambridge

The Madame Tussauds models of Kate Middleton and Prince Harry have been revamped. His now wears a tuxedo, while hers has a new hair cut. 'After two years in the attraction, it seemed the perfect time to give them a glamorous makeover,' said a Tussauds spokesperson.